I’ve never had a shoulder press to write home about, but at one point, it was somewhat respectable for a skinny chick; however, my tendonitis in my left shoulder has been an issue since last October, disabling me from shoulder pressing.
Today, I shoulder pressed. I failed at pressing 30 lbs LESS than my previous one rep max.
30 lbs less…
Now, my strength has not decreased that drastically. I still can perform dips, muscle-ups, push-ups, handstand push-ups, jerk, and push-press just fine.
So what was holding me back?
Not physical scars, but mental. I have become so accustomed to having pain in my shoulder when I do this movement, that I expected it, and in my mind, I actually felt it.
But it wasn’t really there.
Isn’t this much like life? We all have scars in our past; memories of events and occuraces that hurt us, perhaps deeply. If we harp on these memories, we never allow ourselves to get past them. Sometimes, we have the opportunity to experience something great, but our scars from the past hold us back from doing so.
Think about it: I could’ve potentially convinced myself that shoulder-pressing still irritates my shoulder and that I shouldn’t do it. This is no different than convincing yourself that you should never date again because the last guy you dated broke your heart; or telling yourself that you shouldn’t be a parent because your parents failed you.
Some scars are worse than others. Some take longer to fade. And sometimes, they don’t ever fade completely. Sometimes there are always remnants of our past that creep into our psyche and scare us. We can use them as reminders to stay safe, but never allow them to stop us from experiencing something which has the potential to end successfully .
Today, I realized that my scars were affecting my performance. I had to tell myself to be brave. I actually had to say aloud, “This doesn’t hurt”.
Be brave. Allow your scars to heal.